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"Adrianna", by Irene
Copyright © 1999, Age 18
Brad Winters sighed as he entered the hospital. The cold sterile atmosphere always depressed him. It wasn’t a place for anyone to live. Especially someone who was dying.
He walked to the elevators, and pushed the button to go up. The whirring of the elevator reached his ears, and he sighed again. The elevator bell dinged, the doors slid open, and he stepped on. He pressed the button that would take him to the seventh floor, the terminal cancer unit. The doors slid shut. The short ride gave him a moment to ready himself, and plaster a smile on his face. He couldn’t let Adrianna see him down.
Adrianna was his twelve-year-old sister. Brad was seventeen. He was the only one in his family who visited Anna anymore. The last few weeks had been the worst. His mother couldn’t even leave her room because she was so depressed. His father took solace in drinking. He cried all the time, and drank even more often. He couldn’t bear to watch his baby girl wasting away to nothing.
Anna was dying of leukemia. Brad had watched her slowly become a shadow of a person. She had been so full of life before she had gotten sick. It had been only a year since had been diagnosed. In that year, she had gone into remission only once. It had lasted only a month and a half. Two months later, she was in the hospital for good. The illness had worked quickly. She was very near death. The doctors had no hope for her.
When Brad entered Anna’s room, the first thing he noticed were the hundreds of stuffed animals that decorated the room. Every student in Anna’s class had purchased her a stuffed animal, and had them delivered all at once. It had been a very moving sight to witness. Anna had cried; it had been one of the few times that she had let her emotions out.
It brought tears to his eyes just to look at those stuffed animals. Her friends had been so supportive. Many of them had shaved their heads, girls as well as guys, when Anna’s hair had fallen out from the chemotherapy.
Brad forced the tears away, and made his way to Anna’s bed. Her fragile body was covered with a thick patchwork quilt all the way up to her chin. Her eyes were closed. He could see the blue vein sticking out of her head. There were dark shadows under her eyes, and she seemed more pale than usual. He reached down and softly stroked the top of her bald head. He felt the tears coming again. He could remember when he had been five and his mother had brought Anna home. Her head had been bald then, too. That thought made him smile. But she had been so healthy then. From that day on, Brad had felt something for his little sister that he had never felt for anyone. Not his mother, or his father. Even the few girlfriends he had had. He knew she was something special. She had been a sweet child, almost never crying. She was gentle, and always had a smile for everyone. He had never heard her criticize another person.
They had never fought. Although Brad had no idea why, Anna idolized him. She thought he walked on water. Little did she know that she was Brad’s hero. All throughout her illness, she never complained once, except that she hated the hospital. He knew that if she had been given the chance, she would have changed many lives. Brad also knew that he wasn’t anything special, and would have gladly traded places with her. God, how he wished he could.
Her eyes fluttered open. Two blue eyes stared up at him from deep hollows. They were usually bright, but now they were faded. Brad felt his heart tear in two when she smiled at him. She struggled to sit up, but couldn’t.
"Anna, don’t. Just lay still, honey." Brad felt a lump form in his throat. "Hi, Braddy," she said. Her voice was barely above a whisper. "I’m dying." "Don’t say that. You can’t die." Brad’s voice was choked with emotion. "Oh, silly. Everyone dies. But death isn’t forever. Love is. I will see you again. But for now I have to say goodbye. Tell Mom and Dad that I forgive them, ok? Hold me, ok, Braddy? I’m scared."
He held her. She sighed softly, and closed her eyes. He stayed with her for a few minutes, and then realized that the life had left his little sister’s body. He backed away from the bed and fell over the chair. He stayed on the floor and cried.
Three days later, he attended her funeral. It was a cold, windy day. He was still there long after everyone else had left the gravesite. He read the tombstone. Adrianna Michelle Winters... Born 1987 died 1999... We loved her, but God loved her more. "That’s a lie," Brad said aloud, his voice filled with bitterness. "No one loved her more that I did."
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